THE school supply list

27 Jul

You know, I know come the end of August I'm going to bawl…I'm not gonna hide it.  I'm going to cry, cry like a baby when I leave MY bebe at school for the first time.  I even get teary when I think of it. She's gone to day care before, I've left her (with friends and family) before, but she's STARTING SCHOOL!  That's a big thing to me.  She's not a baby any longer, she's 5, she's going to be a Kindergartner. Why is this such a big deal to me?  Well, I could delve into the psyche of Melanie, but really do we want to go there?! LOL…I truly believe it's because I won't have a baby at home any more.  Being a SAHM for most of the past 5 years, she's been my everything.  My life, day and plans revolve around her. When she's at school from 8-3 everyday, she won't be really. She'll make friends, which I want her to, but I won't be her "best friend" anymore.


I'm sure I'm thinking too much and making too much of a big deal out of this, but man…she's growing up?  Why isn't there a pill to stop it? Why can't I have a 5 year old forever?  What if I didn't teach her enough to be ready for school?  There are way too many questions spinning through my head.

So, today, the reason why this all came bubbling to the top was because it was the first time I've ever had to pick up the "school supply list" at our local store.  I had to find her elementary school and pull out the stapled list for grades Pre-K to 5th. I had this lump in my throat as I pulled it out of the turnstyle.  Seeing all these kids running around choosing which back pack and what color scissors they wanted made me hurt, knowing that Kenna will be doing that same thing when I take her next week for supply shopping.  I'm excited for her, she's so ready to go.  She's ready to meet new friends, meet her teacher.  She's ready to bring her lunch box and her backpack.  She's ready to learn and she's ready to grow.  I'm glad that maybe just maybe we did do ok, it's a good sign that she's so happy to go…but it also hurts me too.

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3 Responses to “THE school supply list”

  1. SweetMisery July 26, 2007 at 11:20 pm #

    Many (((Hugs)))) for momma. letting go is very hard indeed.

  2. I-Luv-Eeyore July 27, 2007 at 9:35 am #

    I completely understand! When Jordan started K we had *just* moved (as in less than a week) to a new town/state/community. Jordan stayed with his grandparents until we got packed and moved in, he wasn't there for Welcome to Kindergarten/Meet your teacher night. I had to put him on a school bus and send him off to a place that he had never even been to, to meet people and teachers all by himself. I cried and cried…But, he did wonderfully and I learned to fill my days between 8 and 3.
    Sending them off to Middle School isn't much easier, either.

  3. hydrogeek July 31, 2007 at 7:45 am #

    *fingers in ears* LALALALALALA NOT LISTENING. Tiny baby girls don't grow up and go to school. Period. End of Story.(Hugs, Mel. Crap. Ugh.)

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