A lesson in fatness

26 May

Yip, I went there! Apparently people like it when I talk about my obesity, I still get tons of readers and hits on that one “I’m Obese” post.  And I have to say that dammit, it should have! That was a hard post to write and even harder to actually hit publish. No one likes to be honest especially when it comes to their weight. The fact that I actually told people how much I weighed had people emailing me asking what the hell I was thinking!

In order to finally do something about my weight I had to be up front and open about it. I had to confront it head-on and realize that I’M FAT…no it’s not ok and yes it’s lowering my life expectancy. I wanted to do something about it, I HAD to do something about it. So part of me getting off my ass and doing something about my big-ol-ass I had to write how much I weighed.

You see yourself in the mirror and it’s not the same person you remember but, eh, you don’t look too bad. You still picture yourself a size 6 but when you try on clothes you always have to get a 2xl or a 20 and you think…hm, when did that happen? It’s when you see the “real” you, when you realize that you are a fat ass, that hurts. Take a family picture and think, “whoa, I’m huge”. You see a large woman shopping and think damn I’d hate to be that fat but then you both grab the same size clothes off the rack. Those moments hurt like hell.

You’ve all heard that even losing 10% of your body weight will help with diabetes and other health problems. 10%, that’s not too hard really. And if you weigh 200lbs then that’s only 20lbs and it’s amazing what 20lbs difference will make in your appearance and clothes.

I’m not 220lbs anymore and I’m damn happy to say that. I’m not under 200 yet but I’m so close I could cut my hair and probably be there! LOL.  Those that like math, I’ve almost lost my 10%, I’m 25% of the way to my goal weight. My clothes fit better, well they did until they started falling off. I feel a little more secure when I’m naked. I don’t feel bad if I go grocery shopping in my yoga pants (I may or may not have done that today!). My arms are smaller and feel more “defined”.  I haven’t found my abs yet but I’m sure they’re under the huge layers of fat somewhere.

But the one thing you can totally tell…well, just look:

Here I am at 220lbs. This was actually taken in December 2009.

And here I am last night, at a smidge over 200lbs.  Can you notice the difference? Yeah I don’t have 950 chins!

So, I’m on my way, slowly, but I’m getting there. And if you’re overweight or want to lose a few pounds, you just gotta start!

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7 Responses to “A lesson in fatness”

  1. Dani May 26, 2010 at 1:18 pm #

    Hey Melanie, I came across your blog and wanted to say that you are inspiring! You are so right about HAVING TO DO SOMETHING about it. I’m a personal trainer in New York that specializes in women who want to lose weight and have emotional issues revolving around food and their appearance. I always tell my clients that they have to get frustrated enough with their weight to force themselves to do something about it. No one else can do it for them.

    I myself have struggled with my weight from my years of anorexia and then binge eating. Actually doing something about my weight and doing it in a healthy way has been the most empowering experience ever.

    Your pictures look great and just know that the slower the better. Check out my blog if you want – I offer a fit tip of the day every day. Hopefully I can help you make things a little easier.

    I’m rooting for you!

    Love,
    Dani

    • fourpates May 26, 2010 at 1:21 pm #

      Wow, thank you so much! I will check out your blog, anything that will help. And I do still have issues with emotional eating, I’m sure I always will. I eat something because I’m upset for some reason then I feel guilty for eating it…ugh, just a nasty cycle. But I’m learning! Thanks again!

  2. pinkknotes May 27, 2010 at 7:17 pm #

    You look amazing, sexy lady 🙂 I am so proud of your weight loss and how hard you are working to be a super super sexy MILF 😉

    If I suck my stomach in, I can feel my abs 😉 Keep it up! Can’t wait to (hopefully) see you in July 😀

    • fourpates May 27, 2010 at 9:15 pm #

      I’ve never been called a MILF before and I’m kinda stoked about that! You really know how to make a girl feel good! Smoooches!

  3. hydrogeek May 28, 2010 at 1:51 pm #

    Wow, Mel. I never would have thought that just 20 pounds would make that big of a difference in your chins. Those pictures should serve as an inspiration to anybody thinking about doing something about their weight, since just the first 25% of your goal coming off has obviously made a noticeable difference, and also has made you feel so much more awesome about yourself. Sexy lady, indeed!

    • fourpates May 28, 2010 at 6:23 pm #

      Aw, thanks! It did make a huge difference. I’m still fat but I don’t look 9 mos preggo anymore! I miss you girl!

  4. 40fatandfurious June 22, 2010 at 10:04 pm #

    You look beautiful .. even with the weight on .. but quite stunning sans the other chin lol .. well done 🙂

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