Tag Archives: parenting

My first week – recap

19 Aug

Well, I made it through my first week back to work. It was nice going back, it’s nice being around adults again, although I miss my kids terribly during the day. I knew I’d miss them but it’s harder than I remember it used to be. Kenna is doing so well being at home (school starts in a week for her) and has been doing the chores on her list. Jay is doing pretty good; he did cry one day this week and said he didn’t want to go to “school” aka daycare. But he bounced right back.

I feel like I’m accomplishing something. Yes I cleaned house and cooked while at home but I never felt like I “contributed” to my family. I know that sounds strange. But it all comes down to money, I guess. I kept the house running with cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. but that didn’t add any zeros to the bank account. Now I do that and feel like I’m doing something for them that I couldn’t do before. I feel there’s a little more “equality” with Sean and myself. Now, I’ll never make as much as he does, but that fact that we’re both adding money to the account is nice.

So, onto what I did this week. I embarrassed myself and still do daily. Lemme explain.  I set up the voicemail system for new employees or those that have moved offices/jobs/departments. All this entails is clearing out old voicemail messages, changing their phone display and helping set up new voicemail. Easy, right? Well, when I was doing my own on Monday I set up a system-wide “important announcement” that everyone in the district will hear (at least once). It’s my outgoing message. I mean…everyone, including the superintendent and office staff. UGH, we all had a good laugh and no one really seemed to mind but it was embarrassing nonetheless. Mainly I just learned my computer (it’s a Mac and I’m a windows gal at home), started setting up aforementioned voicemail, went to each school in the district a few times, had new employee training and helped my boss with that. At the end of the week the real “work” started and I had to put in every student from 7-12th grade into the computer. It took me a day and a half, which I thought was excessive but my boss and the other guy in the office (who I guess is my boss too but not my direct supervisor?) were thrilled with how quickly I did it. So, yeah me!

There’s a lady in the main central office who was having a few issues and I helped her through them. She told me that I was the right person for my position and she thanked me profusely. She made me cry. In a happy, “OMG, I’m doing something right” way. It just meant so much to me that she took the time out of her crazy schedule to let me know how much I was appreciated and that I was doing good. It felt nice.

I have one more week of getting used to before school starts and it gets a little crazy. I’ll have to re-figure my schedule once I gotta get Kenna up and deal with another person in our one bathroom. And my knee is feeling better so I’m headed back to the gym this week too. Hopefully I won’t lose my mind as I’m trying to come up with a schedule that works for us while trying to learn my new job.

On the diet front, I apparently needed to go to work to jump-start my weight loss. I’ve been losing about 1lb a week for a while now. I’m not complaining because YEAH! a pound a week is good. But this week I lost 3lbs. Not sure why really. I’m not eating an afternoon snack because I’m at work and I haven’t been working out because of the knee. I have been walking at work as much as I can instead of driving to the nearest school. But even then I’m just sitting at a desk for the most part. But, I’m not going to complain! I’m now down 34lbs since early April. Not too bad, I’m right on track to hitting my goal in March/April of next year. I can fit into 14s comfortably and some 12s, depending on the brand. Heck, even last month when getting work clothes I was in a 16 and squeezing into a 14. Not too shabby!

So there’s my update. I don’t know much at work still so I feel a little helpless since I can’t help people like I want but I’m apparently doing a good job. I love the people I work with; they’re super nice, easy to talk with and feel comfortable with and are jokesters. I’m ready to learn more and make them proud.

Time is moving too quickly

8 Aug

Ever have one of those OMG moments? I did tonight.

Even though I think of my angel babies every day I forget sometimes how old they’d be. The days they were each born plays in my head like a movie daily. Yet, they don’t age. I can remember the day we found out about Avery and the day she was born like it happened just yesterday. The pain isn’t there as badly any more; you learn how to cope with it so it’s easier. The day from hell when Jackson was born still stings, the fear I felt is still there and the sense of no control still haunts me. I remember waking up with a damn tube in my throat and the panic I felt when they sucked it out and finally pulled it out because the respiration tech person didn’t bother to tell me what to expect.

Because I still feel all that, it’s hard to believe it’s been almost 8 years. EIGHT years.

And it’s not just with my angels. I feel the same way sometimes with my kiddoes here on Earth. Kenna is 10, where the hell did this decade go? Jay, my sweet baby Jay, is no longer a baby.

Heck, I even remember my wedding day and being so hot in my dress before the ceremony and kinda freaking out a little too. So I guess it’s not just my kids that I wonder where the time went.

Even though I feel like the years have flown, I still feel young. Forgetting all the time how old I am and constantly asking Sean or doing the math. Does everyone do this or am I just losing my mind?! LOL

I think in terms of “how much longer”. I have 6 years till my girl drives and 8 until she graduates and, hopefully, leaves the nest to grow her own wings. Then I think…wow when she’s 16, Jay will be 9. I won’t need a babysitter anymore in a few years either! But geeze, when Kenna is gone what will it be like to have one kid at home again? He’ll only be 11, will he be happy that big sister is gone or will he be bummed because his buddy is leaving?

It’s too much sometimes. And I’ve decided they both need to stop growing! LOL 🙂

Holy crap, does this blog still work?

24 Jun

I mean, it’s only been a year and a half since I wrote anything. Guess that means I don’t have much of a life or a reader base anymore.

Let’s see, in the past 18 months what all has happened;
1. Stuff with kids
2. Stuff with family
3. Stuff with life

That pretty much sums that up. My kids are huge and I continuously tell my daughter to stop growing. The boy got rid of the paci and potty trained all in 6 months. I’m still a SAHM but hopefully not for too much longer. I have a job interview this week and I’d really like this job, mainly to feel like I contribute to the family and so I’m around adults again. Cross your fingers for me.

I’ve started on my weight loss journey again. Yeah, yeah, yeah, again. I KNOW! I tried to do the surgical route but my insurance decided to be assholes, so now I’m doing it the “old fashioned” way. I’ve been on the journey since early-April and I’m down 23lbs. I’m down 3 sizes and already feel better about myself. I work out 6 days a week and actually miss it if I don’t go to the gym. Which is completely 100% strange for me. My sis also now got me hooked on Zumba. I wasn’t sure I’d like it, but we went together at my gym while she was visiting and I’ve been back since (2x a week). I LOVE it. I love dancing (hello, have you read my blog?) and I feel so good/sweaty/accomplished when that hour is done. If I keep up this whole “blogging” thing that I suck at, I’m sure this will turn into a weight loss blog (yeah, another).

Family is awesome. I’ve never been happier and I love where I/we are right now. We did have a loss though. In January we had to put down our baby, Hopie, the shih-tzu. She helped me get through Avery’s (our first baby) death. Putting her down due to age and illness brought back that pain and it hurt bad. I hadn’t cried like that in a long time. We had gotten a Boston Terrier the summer before, so luckily we have her to love on, but we still miss our Hopie.

Health, eh. I’m healthier than I have been, I think. But the ankles still suck. I fell on Christmas Eve and broke a bone in my ankle and got another 3rd degree sprain. The good thing, the ER was surprisingly slow on Christmas Eve and so my wait time was nil. Saw an orthopod and was in a boot. All is well now. My RSD leg still hurts. Guess it always will. Temperature changes, socks, air, touching still suck too.

Hmpf, I guess that’s all. The way I write I may not be back until January 2014 and by then I’ll weigh 140lbs. Ha!

Sick and tired of being sick and tired

6 Jan

I have been sick since Christmas day. That, my dears, is almost 2 weeks…14 days of feeling like caca. I’m going to the doc in a little while, so we’ll see what he says but I’m ready to do a headectomy or maybe even a neckectomy. Sure, I wouldn’t be much fun to be around but I betcha I’d finally feel better!

Sean left yesterday and I was one of those girls that cried when he walked out the door. How sad is that? It’s not like he’ll be gone for a long time, just until Sunday and I even have plans myself it just hit me though. It seems like since we moved we’ve been so distant from each other. Stressing about the move, new job, finances, kids being sick, all of the family being sick and then the holidays have just taken a toll on us as a couple right now. When he gets home we WILL find a sitter, he’s already been asking around his coworkers if they know anyone, and we WILL go on a date. Y’all, I haven’t had a date with my husband in years and that’s not an exaggeration, it’s the honest truth. I miss him and I miss adult time. I miss eating without a kid throwing food or screaming. I miss sitting at a table that isn’t huge. I miss going to see a non-kid movie and holding hands in the theater. Don’t get me wrong, I love my kids 110% (usually) and would die without them but I need time to connect with the person that gave me those kids. I totally believe that spending time away from them will make me a better mom.

Anyway, enough whining. I’m headed to the doc in a bit. Then this weekend I’m going to have FUN!

A friend

3 Jan

I have a friend whom I met almost 10 years ago, yet I’ve only ever seen her in person two times. We met on an online message board about pregnancy and infant loss. I was mourning the loss of Avery and wasn’t sure where to turn or what to do or how to think or…well, you get the idea, I was lost. In some sick way it was a comfort reading about these other ladies that were going through something similar to what I was, see; I wasn’t the only one dealing with this.

I’m not sure what made me read her story but I felt a blow to my gut when I read her story. Her full term son was born with an umbilical cord issue (I won’t even try to explain it), he lived for a few days and died in his mother’s arms. I felt so sorry for her that she and her hubby had to decide to disconnect life support for their son. I felt that she was going through something so much worse than I was. I sat and wondered what would be easier; a stillborn whom you never get to see alive or a full term baby who is a live for days (weeks, months) and you have to decide when the “right” time to say goodbye is.

The first time we met we sat up drinking, laughing and bawling by a hotel pool. We had this instant connection, something all the other mommy’s there with us couldn’t understand. I told her how I felt, how awful I felt for her. We hugged and cried and laughed and drank some more. She told me later something that I’ll never forget;

It does not matter how long you know your child; if you see them breathing, if they talk to you or if you feel them in your womb, they are still your child and it still hurts like hell when they leave.

So true.

So, here’s to Corbyn, my friend’s baby boy. He would be 10 years old today. You’ve touched more lives than you know and I thank you. Now, enjoy your birthday cake with Avery and Jackson for me.

I need toddler sized safety gear

6 Nov

I swear, this boy is gonna be the death of me. Sure, Kenna fell, tripped and got bumps and bruises but NEVER did she need to be taken to the ER or make me worry if she’s got a concussion.

First off on Halloween, we were trick-or-treating and having a grand old time. Sean was letting Jay run around and Jay tripped. He cried, even when Sean picked him up which is a little unusual. But the fall didn’t look that bad, he did have his hand stuck inside his costume so he couldn’t break his fall. But after a few minutes he stopped crying and went to the next house.

We get home and I get Jay into his PJs and notice something on his tooth. I figured it was a hair or something. NOPE…Jaylon broke his tooth! His front top tooth, all the way in half. I have no clue how it was still attached. So, we loaded up and went to the ER. They did nothing, not even contact the on call dentist. They just referred us to a local pediatric dentist and sent us on our merry way.

As soon as they opened on Monday morning I called and they had us come in, saying we may have to wait for a bit. Luckily we didn’t have to, they got us in in about 10 minutes! They did a quick x-ray and the dentist came in and took a look. Then looked at the xray again, then took another look. Decided that his teeth looked great but that one was broken all the way through horizontally AND broken vertically in the back, so it had to come out. He thought about sedating him if he needed more work done but since this was his only problem decided to just numb him up and pull it.

See, here’s the deal, I don’t do teeth. Let me just say that again…I DON’T DO TEETH! When I was younger my mom pulled a bottom tooth that was NOT supposed to come out yet, thinking it was the super wiggly one. I trace my tooth-aversion to that day, since I was like 6-7 and totally remember everything she said/did!  UGH…

I explained to the doc that I just can’t handle teeth but I’d stay in there if I could. He laughed and said that was fine and walked me through what needed to be done. As soon as the first shot happened and Jay screamed like I’ve never heard him scream and the blood started…I about hurled. The doc looked at me (I’m now white as a sheet, nauseated and tearing up) and laughed and said “why don’t you just wait out there, I don’t want to fix one of your teeth after you pass out”. Then said the nicest thing…”no one will think you’re a bad mom if you leave him with us. He’s in good hands, I will treat him like he’s my son.” UGH, made me cry more.

5 minutes later Jay came out bloodied all to hell. He was laughing and playing with the nurses until he saw me, then he cried! LOL…little shit would not leave the gauze in, so he bled everywhere.

Turns out the tooth was cracked all the way up inside his gums to his nerve. I’m glad the doc decided it needed to be pulled.

Fast forward to today. I leave to go get dinner because I never cook on Saturdays, don’t ask, just something that we always do.  So, Kenna and I leave to get the food. When we get home Jay is pissy, which is normal for him because he hasn’t eaten yet and OMG, it’s already 5:30, where is my dinner woman? He’s pretty fussy through all of dinner time. I see a new bruise on his forehead and Sean tells me he fell outside. Nothing new there. I swear the boy can’t walk 5 steps without tripping over himself. I didn’t really freak out until I was cleaning him up and notice the marble sized bump on his head. UGH…so I pick him up and love on him a little. I get his PJs on and milk and we cuddle. He’s acting fine but now I’ll worry all night that he’s got a concussion! LOL

I’m not sure if I’m just overly paranoid because he’s my boy and he really wasn’t even supposed to be here, or maybe I know that while all children are miracles, he truly is one…I dunno but I freak every time the kid hurts himself, which is usually every 30 minutes or so. Sean is annoyed by it, I’m sure he thinks I’m making Jay a wus and maybe I am…but SERIOUSLY…a head injury! LOL I know, I know, I am being way too protective, hell even with Kenna I’m different (see: Are you bleeding? No. Then you’re fine.)

Anyway, I will need every sort of insurance you can get on someone. I have a feeling by the time Jay is grown and we’re not responsible for medical bills any more and he will start to pay his own, we’ll have paid enough to actually OWN the hospital!

Here’s Jay now, btw. It’s the best pic I can get of him since it’s impossible to get him to stop and let me take a pic.

A fortnight

23 Sep

Wow, can you believe it’s not a scrapbook related post? LOL

Anyway, I’ve been so consumed with the move lately that I haven’t had much time to blog. Good news is that the house is on the market and the sign is in the front. I really hope it rents before we move. That way I know there’s no “lag” time and the house isn’t empty for long after we’re gone. Plus then we’ll have the money coming in to cover our mortgage/rent. It sucks keeping the house “show ready” though. The house is clean it’s just that Jay is a little tornado. So, no matter how many times a day I clean up his toys it’s always messy. Hopefully the realtor will give me enough notice to run through and pick up toys before a showing (she’s supposed to).

We found our house in the new town. It’s a cute little house. It’s supposed to be bigger than ours now but it just doesn’t seem like it. I’m sure it has to do with the layout of the house and it doesn’t have the great room we do here but it’ll do nicely for us. I will miss our living room here, our fireplace (yeah, even though we haven’t used it) and just the WOW factor you get when you walk into our house now. But the new place is quite cozy. The laundry room is massive and will not only be the laundry room but also our office and homework room too (yes, it’s HUGE).  Another bummer is our room is close to the kids, we don’t have that split floorplan so we’re not on the other side of the house. The reason this kinda sucks is obvious; I’ll have to be quiet now! HA! (Yeah yeah…my parents read the blog but I’m pretty sure they know we have sex)  I’m looking forward to the move, moving is a great way to start fresh. Get rid of all the old crap around the house, old clothes that don’t fit (did I say HELLO 14’s!) and purge it all. I hate packing but love throwing away a bunch of bullshit stuff we’ve kept for a few years. Kenna’s totally excited because she gets a new big bed. She’s been sleeping on the same mattress since we got her a big girl bed so she really needed it, and it just happened that Ma and Chris got a new bed so they have their old queen set. Jaylon just liked running through the new house when it was empty and screaming in every room because of the echo, he’s still clueless as to what’s going to happen in 2 weeks.

All the utilities have been scheduled for turn on or off, moving truck is reserved and help is coming. 2 more weeks!

Yeah, that was me!

9 Sep

* Note, if you’re looking for the giveaway of Persnickety goodness, go here!

So yeah, that was me at the Wal-Marts in the shirt I wore to bed last night.

Yeah, that was me with the greasy pony tail’d hair that hasn’t been washed since yesterday.

Oh and that was me who kept pulling my panties out of my tush because of the gigantic queen sized matress pad I am wearing today (thanks Auntie Flo).

And you can guarantee that that was me giving gift-giving advice to a woman in the toy isle while MY kid was screaming and had green snot running down his face.

That lady wandering around the Wal-Marts for 4o minutes (because her son’s prescription for a double-ear infection was being filled) talking on the phone about 2 month expired ham…sure that was me too.

If you saw me and didn’t say hi…I don’t blame you. But ya know what? At least I brushed my teeth and put on a bra, thankyouverymuch!

Overheard at the Pate casa

30 Jul

Having 2 kids, a dog and a husband, you overhear a lot of strange things in our house. It’s funny really, somethings I never thought I’d say come flying from my mouth pretty much every day.

  • Be nice to your wee-hee
  • Stop throwing shoes at your brother
  • You stink, time to clean your tushie-wushie
  • Do NOT eat that
  • Oh, God, please tell me that’s dirt
  • I smell shit, honey, sniff his tush
  • Dude, the blob that the spoon made looks exactly like Shakespeare

I’ve added a pic of Shakespeare. OH and no worries, I’ve washed the stove since taking this pic! HA!

Yeah, you just never know what you’re going to hear here!

I’m walkin

18 Jun

Well, he’s not really walking just yet.  He’s close and he’s loving walking behind a toy that Aunt Shell got him for Christmas. And so what if I was bored and feeling “crafty” the other night, this is what happens when I do (turn on your speakers, yo!):

I’M WALKIN’

And again, because WP is mean and won’t let us upload a video without paying an arm and a leg, you gotta go to Flickr and watch it there. Enjoy, watch it a few times, laugh because I do when I watch…I’m not sure if it’s the fact that he’s so proud of himself or it’s the music I chose but it just makes me giggle!